Tag Archives: People

Questions Not To Ask On A First Date

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First Date

We’ve all been there – the nervous first date. You meet up with your victim/date and sit down to chat over a coffee. But, after a while you’ve exhausted the regular questions like “so, what do you do for a living?” and “lovely weather, isn’t it?” There’s an awkward silence as you both reach for the last digestive biscuit…

To help you, I’ve come up with a handy list of questions that you can ask your date, to get the conversation moving again.

Here’s some good ones:

  1. What is your dream job?
  2. Do you have any interesting collections?
  3. If you could wake up tomorrow with any ability, what would you choose?
  4. If you throw a cat out of a car window, does it become kitty litter?
  5. If a cow laughed, would milk come out of its nose?
  6. If someone with multiple personality disorder threatens suicide, is that considered a hostage situation?

Continue reading →

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A Reason To Hate Snow

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You know what? Snow reminds me of a distant Auntie’s visit on Christmas Day. Everything seems very pleasant and enjoyable for the first 5 minutes and the children enjoy playing with her. But then you realise that she hasn’t really brought anything nice with her. She then overstays her welcome, irritates you to the point of hatred and gives you a frosty reception when you attempt to reshape her into a man.

Still, at least you can rely on teenagers to provide a smile in the snowy weather. I don’t know about you, but I feel positive that the future of our country will be safe in the hands of our young folk; particularly the ‘sensible ones’ who walk around in the bitter cold wearing t-shirts (or hoodies) and writing “amusing” messages on the front of parked cars. I watch them walk down the road, hoping that at some point they might slip over and impale themselves on a fence post. Should it happen, I intend to nip out and transcribe the word “twat!” in the pool of blood lying next to them. Hey, I may even draw a little picture.

Cars in the Snow

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The Self-Importance Of Facebook, Twitter

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Self Important Flag-Bearer

Is Social Networking Breeding a New Culture Of Self-importance?

So, you’ve got 200 Facebook friends and 20 Twitter followers. You feel important – right up there, in celebrity status, alongside Tom Cruise, Pope Benedict XVI and… Susan Boyle. People seem to want to follow your every move – and you oblige by telling them when you eat breakfast, visit the toilet and wash your best pair of pants.

Then, one day, you go through your friends list and it hits you – 195 of your 200 Facebook friends are actually made up of the following: Continue reading →

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The Humorous Side Of Japanese People

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“If I was to punch that rich looking guy, would he sue me?” That was the question I put to my brother whilst we were walking around our Onsen Hotel in Kotohira, Japan. His response was quick: “No, he’d probably apologise for walking into your fist.”

It’s funny, but it does actually make an interesting point about how friendly Japanese people are. My brother is right – the man would probably stand there and apologise and bow profusely. To get him to stop bowing, I’d probably have to punch him again… harder… somewhere in the chest cavity… with some knuckle dusters… Continue reading →

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Woman Diagnosed With Vegetable Phobia

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Vicki Larrieux, a 22-year-old student from Portsmouth, claims she is unable to keep to a healthy diet because she is frightened of vegetables. She suffers from a fear known as lachanophobia, which leaves her sweating and stricken with panic attacks at the merest sight of a sprout or a pea.

Miss Larrieux survives on a diet of meat, potatoes, cereals and an occasional apple but refuses even a single slice of carrot on her dinner plate. ”I have always had an irrational fear of vegetables even as a child I used to properly freak out if some carrots or a few peas were on my plate,” she said. ”But as it continued into adult life I started to think it might not just be a dislike for vegetables but an actual phobia.

“Every time I would see vegetables not just on my plate, but anywhere I would get feelings of panic, start sweating and my heart rate would shoot up.

Read the full article on the Telegraph website

Vegetables

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Old People Watching

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Those who know me well will know that I’ve recently become very interested in psychology and body language. I enjoy people watching. Interestingly, I looked up the description of ‘people watching’ in Wikipedia and it says:

People watching “is the act of observing people and their interactions, usually without their knowledge.” Perfecto! It then goes on to point out that “this differs from voyeurism in that it does not relate to sex or sexual gratification“…. well, thank goodness for that – it isn’t a fetish afterall. Supposing I were to do it whilst wearing a latex suit? Continue reading →

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